Invitasion? quoi?

Just in-case You wondering what I been up to, the absent, the MIA, the KL trip, the migraine and mysterious code talking on the phone check this out, I hope it will answer everything, more update? check this space even better checkout my facebook

Stray

Went to Kl last weekend to help my sister pickup someting from her uni and everyone is coming, but I know better that the only reason everyone eager to go is Fathi, I manage to go shopping with my mom, aunty and Along (my BIG sister), get a pair of crocs, beraya and play with Fathi, its tiring yet a very satisfying short trip.

Since we leave JB at night, there's nothing much to see but the dark road while discussing some important matter that's not ready for debut here, on the way back to JB the rain escorted us right after we enter the Johor border, with a wet road the kenari that i drove cant go any faster than 70Kmph, so i start messing around with the radio and the cd player while i know theres should be nothing on, but to my surprise one of my favourite CD start playing, the CD player should be broken let alone play CD, so i ending up listening to the whole Alanis Moriesett 10 years anniversary album with the bonus track all the way to JB.

The album triggered a lot of memory, goals, achievements and accidents, it make me thinking where am I, why I do it and what I do, things that again and again I manage to forget just because I rush it, things like why I blog in english, why I take the job im doing now, what im going to do with my life and why I dont do long term planning any-more and most important things is the direction me and my finance took.

After all this time and everything I been trough, there no actual answer but more question, the only thing I know now is, money is not everything and one will stray from one path when they rush.

try to understand this if you can

Lyrics from an Australian band titled No Longer There

And though you'd like to hear a song
That sings everything's all right
The temperature is warm
The fire horses sleep
So gently comes the night

You close your eyes and stare
The ground they're on is bare
But once it was as deep
As wildest giants dreams
It's no longer there

And all of our desires
They mirror skies with flames
And smoke out heaven's halls
Who was that you called
They're no longer there

Here it goes again
Here it goes again
Here it goes again

What would you leave behind when all your fields are dead?
When your territories are dried out and your cities drowned and swept
What would you leave behind when those who bear your name
Are born in that place that you wrecked?
What would you leave behind when you're no longer there?

Would you sail to distant shores?
And hide within the hills
And softly close your doors
Pretend the world is safe
And wait for heaven's call

Or would you turn and face the seas
And come beside your cave
There's chance but if you dare
And swift as honour's steeds
Before it's no longer there

Here it goes again
Here it goes agaaain
Here it goes aga .. ain!

What would you leave behind when all your fields are dead?
When your territories are dried out and your cities drowned and swept
What would you leave behind
When those who bear your name are born in that place that you wrecked?
What would you leave behind when you're no longer there?

To deny or to despair
It's really just the same
Everything between
It means we have to change
Cos when a one forgets
The world begins to fade
And all the shapes and shades
That made the colours see
When they suddenly turned grey
That they're no longer there

apa itu merdeka

bagi aku

merdeka bukan countdown
merdeka bukan enjoy
merdeka bukan berarak
merdeka bukan berbaris
merdeka bukan artis realiti
merdeka bukan lagu patriotik
merdeka bukan cogan kata
merdeka bukan bahasa ingeris
merdeka bukan bahasa Malaysia
merdeka bukan 31 ogos

merdeka ialah tangungjawab
merdeka ialah banyak membaca
merdeka ialah kurang hiburan
merdeka ialah tidak takut dengan bayang-bayang
merdeka ialah berani bersuara
merdeka ialah berani berambut hitam
merdeka ialah berani berkulit gelap
merdeka ialah berpelajaran
merdeka ialah engkau
merdeka ialah aku

terus-terang pendapat aku nilai merdeka semakin kurang setiap tahun kerana kita semua, kasihan orang-orang terdahulu yang tahu nilai sebenar merdeka.

selamat menyambut hari kemerdekaan

Weekend

Memang aku ada plan nak pergi Melbourne dengan isteri aku dan kerja disana suatu hari nanti, aku pernah buat dulu kenapa takboleh buat lagi sekarang atau suatu hari nanti.

Aku selalu cerita dengan emak dan abah aku, tapi minggu lepas aku cakap lagi dengan dia dalam perjalanan ke Singapura.

Aku : Abah, tahun depan kita pindah Austrlia.

Abah: (senyap)

Aku : kat sana pun ada masjid, Abah masih boleh kasik kuliah kat masjid macam biasa.

Abah: abah taknak nanti sampai-sampai sana meninggal orang tak kenal, macam ada orang tuh, sampai sana aje orang tuh meninggal, pastuh takde orang sembahyang kan.

Aku : (senyap)

Abah: Atuk kamu ada 5 orang anak lelaki, tapi masa dia meninggal seorang aje yang sempat sampai, sorang tak dapat balik, kamu bayangkan, Abah ada satu.

perbualan terhenti di situ, suasana senyap menemani perjalanan, walaupun radio Singapura yang dipasangkan biasanya kelakar dengan ucapan perkahwinan hujung minggu.

Aku bukan sengaja nak cakap macam tuh kat dia, atau trigger perkara-perkara sensitive, pada hari weekend, tapi nak biasakan mereka dengan idea yang aku akan berjauhan lagi dengan mereka satu hari nanti, hakikatnya tidak juga aku bersungguh untuk berpindah overseas, tetapi aku sememangnya akan memastikan yang aku akan sentias dekat dengan mereka.